We arrive at the doctor's office and the nurse brings us back into the exam room and mumbles, what I heard as, the following: "Dr. should be done with surgery and heading up any minute"..."undress and lie face down (?)"...and something about a sheet- I assume she is referring to the green folded one on the table- as she shut the door. So, Matt sits down, takes my coat and purse from me, I say, "Face down?" He looks at me and says something to the effect of, "Maybe you're supposed to have your butt in the air?" Continuing to find it strange, I take my sheet into the changing stall in the corner and proceed to undress. Halfway through I begin to remove my shirt when it occurs to me that there's no breast exam today...so I ask Matt to go ask the nurse if I need to take my shirt off. He sighs and fulfills my request. I overhear the nurse say, "No, I said from the waist down." (Waist down, face down...it sounds the same, right?) Feeling sheepish, I open up the sheet- which turns out to be rather small- and suddenly feel very grateful I double checked.
Just as I am about to sit on the exam table, the Doctor walks in and shakes
my hand, followed by Matt's. He then opens my chart, explains a few things
to Matt- since I was the one who actually received the lab results from his
test, not him- and then puts my feet in the stirrups. As he turns around to put
on his gloves, I examine my new footrests and discover they are horse puppets-
stirrups dressed as horse puppets- how ironic. Placing my rear all the way at
the end of the table, I lay down and feel something cold, something
uncomfortable- which proceeds to become more uncomfortable- then I hear a click.
"Is that bearable for a couple minutes?" he asks. "Oh sure," I say aloud- (just
as comfy as a bed of nails!) *insert eye rolling here* They're men...they don't
know. Then he inserts, what I swear looks like, pliers, pulls them out to show
me how the elasticity is good in my cervical mucus (Oh thanks, always wanted to
see that! I'm sure Matt did too!) and then takes a sample. The "fun" part is
finally over as he removes evil metal duck thingy, and leaves the room to
examine the specimen. I run into the changing stall and dress. Waiting...
He came back much sooner than expected and said everything looked good. (Oh
good, my mucus isn't killing Matt's "boys"!) "Lots of little swimmers!" he
exclaimed, and proceeded to tell us that they were moving around just fine- yay,
the viscosity isn't an issue- and that if we don't get pregnant this month, he
wants me back for the dye test next month. So, I am feeling hopeful. I am
relieved that nothing serious is wrong so far, and also a little confused as to
why we aren't pregnant yet- since everything is normal. I know, though, that
all things happen for a reason and when it's time, we will have a little one in
our lives. Until then, I'll try to relax and let nature take it's course-
hopefully. Nighty night blog world!
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