Doubt Confirmed

Well, my doubts about being pregnant have been confirmed. I woke up to find that evil red stuff and have been sulking around most of the day. Somehow I knew a few days ago that I wasn’t pregnant…which, I think, did it’s part in building a solid wall against my emotions. I have prayed that if I can’t be pregnant, that I can at least feel comforted. Well, I am actually doing O.K. While I’m feeling a little down, I didn’t fall apart this morning. My exact words to my husband were, “Well, that’s that!” Is it normal to feel this nonchalant about it? I suppose after a year of failure, you learn to deal with it. Every month feels less and less like a major loss. Maybe I was just being prepared for what I’ll have to deal with while going to the fertility doctor. I’ll need a strong wall to get through the next few months. The appointment is Friday. Details then.

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