Showing posts with label gestational diabetes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label gestational diabetes. Show all posts
Here we go again...
Today I called in to get the results of my glucose test. As expected, I do have
gestational diabetes. :( While I was holding on to an ounce of hope that I
wouldn't have to do this again, I was realistic and pretty much expected that I
would. So, out comes all the diet info and so begins the multiple finger pricks
a day. We're hoping to control it this time with diet and exercise so hopefully
I won't have to give myself shots again, but we'll see. I'm also pretty anemic
so I've been instructed to begin taking iron supplements twice a day. Hopefully
that will give me a bit more energy. I have 11.5 weeks left until my due date.
I can totally do this again. Right?
The Coveted Coke With Lime
Today marks 14 weeks into this pregnancy and I woke up feeling the worst I
have in weeks. This doesn't bode well for the supposed break from nausea in the
second trimester. Still, I will hold out hope. I had to take the evil glucose
test- where they make you drink the orange drink- at my last appointment. It
made me feel like I was on speed (not that I really know what being on
speed feels like but I would imagine it would be something like that). I
didn't have that feeling when I took the test with Zoe so I'm not sure what that
means. I haven't heard back yet on the result. I'm pretty much counting on
having gestational diabetes again though. I figure if it turns out that I don't
have it, I'll be happy about it of course, but if I do, then I expected it so no
big deal. I will admit to indulging in several guilty pleasures this week just
in case I have to do without them for several months. I was thinking the other
day about this thought I used to have as a young girl. I'd see these women in
hospital gowns sitting outside the women's center in wheelchairs smoking and I'd
think to myself, "Why, after giving it up for so many months, would they go
right back to it?" I spent a few years as a smoker- which of course makes me a
hypocrite to my younger self- and I still didn't understand it. It wasn't until
I was pregnant with Zoe and having to deal with gestational diabetes that it
came to me. Every time I had to say no to that roll, the sweet cream ice cream
with raspberries, one too many grapes, or the decadent chocolate cake, I would
say to myself, "Just a few more weeks and you can have it back." At the
time, Coke with lime was my ambrosia- if you will- and my mantra was, "This
sucks but as soon as this baby comes I'm going to have a giant Coke with lime!"
Those women probably spent their whole pregnancy avoiding cigarettes by telling
themselves, "As soon as the baby comes you can have one." It's sad, really, but
it does get you through.
Now, being on a diabetes diet did wonders for my weight gain. I lost all of my pregnancy weight within 10 days of Zoe's birth. I didn't feel weighed down by the food I ate, I didn't have problems with constipation, upset stomach, or many of those common pregnancy symptoms while on that diet, but it was hard! I had to plan every meal. I had to know how many carbs was in everything I ate. I could only have a specific amount of carbs for each meal and each snack. I had to know that there was about 1 gram of carbs per grape. Worse, when I was hungry I wanted to eat "right now" not have to prepare something. Not only was the planning and the patience hard, but it was rough on our wallet. Protein and produce is much more expensive than boxed snacks and pasta.
Then came the time when dieting and "exercising" wasn't enough to keep my sugar levels in check and they made me start taking insulin. I am afraid of needles and every day I had to "pinch an inch" on my sides and inject myself with insulin. I cried the day they told me, not just because of the needles, but because I felt I had failed. The whole time I was dealing with diabetes I was thinking, "I'm not really that out of shape, I'm not overweight, I'm not a health-nut but I watch my portions and I don't eat a ton of junk food, why am I even dealing with this?" I felt I had failed my body by not taking care of it the way I was supposed to. I swore that I would live healthier going forward.
When it was all over I did keep up with many of the principles of the diabetes diet...but as Zoe had gotten older and my life has become more busy, I have become lazy. It's so much easier to eat a hot dog with her than try to make myself a salad (not that she actually eats a lot of hot dogs...she probably has a much more balanced diet than I do). I'm home a lot more now so I'll get hungry and get a snack. I live in the middle of nowhere and, since winter hit, I haven't really done much in the way of exercise. As we speak, I'm staring gestational diabetes in the face and eating a dove chocolate. Apparently I have learned nothing. Because no matter what, I love sweets, I like carbs, and yes I try to balance them with proteins and fresh veggies, but I fail a lot of the time. I'm sorry, but Coke with lime is delicious! If I have gestational diabetes again, I will certainly do everything I can to keep myself and this baby healthy...just like I did with Zoe. I may have an opportunity to use a treadmill soon, and I bought a pregnancy yoga video...took me longer than I planned. I have the desire to be more healthy. If I can't escape gestational diabetes this time, maybe I can become more healthy and beat it next time...or at least avoid getting type 2 diabetes later in life. Maybe this time some habits will stick. I hope they do.
Now, being on a diabetes diet did wonders for my weight gain. I lost all of my pregnancy weight within 10 days of Zoe's birth. I didn't feel weighed down by the food I ate, I didn't have problems with constipation, upset stomach, or many of those common pregnancy symptoms while on that diet, but it was hard! I had to plan every meal. I had to know how many carbs was in everything I ate. I could only have a specific amount of carbs for each meal and each snack. I had to know that there was about 1 gram of carbs per grape. Worse, when I was hungry I wanted to eat "right now" not have to prepare something. Not only was the planning and the patience hard, but it was rough on our wallet. Protein and produce is much more expensive than boxed snacks and pasta.
Then came the time when dieting and "exercising" wasn't enough to keep my sugar levels in check and they made me start taking insulin. I am afraid of needles and every day I had to "pinch an inch" on my sides and inject myself with insulin. I cried the day they told me, not just because of the needles, but because I felt I had failed. The whole time I was dealing with diabetes I was thinking, "I'm not really that out of shape, I'm not overweight, I'm not a health-nut but I watch my portions and I don't eat a ton of junk food, why am I even dealing with this?" I felt I had failed my body by not taking care of it the way I was supposed to. I swore that I would live healthier going forward.
When it was all over I did keep up with many of the principles of the diabetes diet...but as Zoe had gotten older and my life has become more busy, I have become lazy. It's so much easier to eat a hot dog with her than try to make myself a salad (not that she actually eats a lot of hot dogs...she probably has a much more balanced diet than I do). I'm home a lot more now so I'll get hungry and get a snack. I live in the middle of nowhere and, since winter hit, I haven't really done much in the way of exercise. As we speak, I'm staring gestational diabetes in the face and eating a dove chocolate. Apparently I have learned nothing. Because no matter what, I love sweets, I like carbs, and yes I try to balance them with proteins and fresh veggies, but I fail a lot of the time. I'm sorry, but Coke with lime is delicious! If I have gestational diabetes again, I will certainly do everything I can to keep myself and this baby healthy...just like I did with Zoe. I may have an opportunity to use a treadmill soon, and I bought a pregnancy yoga video...took me longer than I planned. I have the desire to be more healthy. If I can't escape gestational diabetes this time, maybe I can become more healthy and beat it next time...or at least avoid getting type 2 diabetes later in life. Maybe this time some habits will stick. I hope they do.
32, Mothers, and The Shots
The title is a perfect example of how I'm feeling lately. It seems that the minute the weather starts to warm up, we are busy little bees. For instance, every day for the next 11 days is planned. While this is certainly helping the time fly by, it is also making me tired. I spend any extra time resting with my feet up to try to keep the swelling down. Instead I would like to be finishing Zoe's room, cleaning my house, running errands, finishing projects...you get the idea. Anyhow, that is my excuse- yes I know I'm full of those- for not posting until now. And on to the update:
I am 32 weeks...which means I have roughly 7 and a half weeks left until my due date...which is not very long and yet is an eternity. Zoe is almost 4 pounds- and I can feel her weight starting to take it's toll on my back, my bones and my energy level. She's still kicking around in there fairly often...many times torturing my poor ribs. I have been having small contractions a bit more often...but no worries. I am starting to feel more out of breath and get heartburn after nearly everything I eat. I have another doctor's appointment on Wednesday.
Mother's Day was really fun for me. Love got me an hour long pregnancy massage...something I've been wanting for a bit. Now I just have to decide when to get it. :) My Mom, my sister, both Grandma's and my Aunt made it a point to tell me "Happy Mother's Day" and it meant a lot to me. I got to speak with many of the mothers in my life and spent the afternoon with Love's family for dinner. Overall it was a great day. Last year Mother's Day was a bit painful for me, so I shared my thoughts about my own Mother. This year Mother's Day was filled with hope and excitement for what is to come. I love these feelings.
Today I had another appointment with the Diabetes people and it didn't go so well. I feel confused. My doctor tells me I don't have diabetes, my numbers (blood sugar levels) tell me I do. When I went in today I wasn't sure what to expect. They are worried that my numbers are getting higher and decided to put me on a small dose of insulin and I, once again, have to test my sugars 7 times a day. I hate to admit it, but I have cheated a few times as far as the amount of carbs I have and haven't been exercising the last couple of weeks. I was emotional about the whole thing for several reasons:
1. I'm pregnant and am therefore emotional about everything.
2. I feel like it's my fault because I haven't been doing EVERYTHING I can to stay within range.
3. I breathed a sigh of relief when my OB/GYN said I didn't have gestational diabetes, but still knew I wasn't normal and today made me realize I really do have it.
4. I hate needles. Pricking myself has been bad enough, now I have to give myself a shot once a day.
I am just tired. I want this pregnancy to be over so I know she's here and she's safe and my body can return to a state of normalcy. In the meantime, I'm trying to get a handle on my emotions and trying to find the will to do better.
I am 32 weeks...which means I have roughly 7 and a half weeks left until my due date...which is not very long and yet is an eternity. Zoe is almost 4 pounds- and I can feel her weight starting to take it's toll on my back, my bones and my energy level. She's still kicking around in there fairly often...many times torturing my poor ribs. I have been having small contractions a bit more often...but no worries. I am starting to feel more out of breath and get heartburn after nearly everything I eat. I have another doctor's appointment on Wednesday.
Mother's Day was really fun for me. Love got me an hour long pregnancy massage...something I've been wanting for a bit. Now I just have to decide when to get it. :) My Mom, my sister, both Grandma's and my Aunt made it a point to tell me "Happy Mother's Day" and it meant a lot to me. I got to speak with many of the mothers in my life and spent the afternoon with Love's family for dinner. Overall it was a great day. Last year Mother's Day was a bit painful for me, so I shared my thoughts about my own Mother. This year Mother's Day was filled with hope and excitement for what is to come. I love these feelings.
Today I had another appointment with the Diabetes people and it didn't go so well. I feel confused. My doctor tells me I don't have diabetes, my numbers (blood sugar levels) tell me I do. When I went in today I wasn't sure what to expect. They are worried that my numbers are getting higher and decided to put me on a small dose of insulin and I, once again, have to test my sugars 7 times a day. I hate to admit it, but I have cheated a few times as far as the amount of carbs I have and haven't been exercising the last couple of weeks. I was emotional about the whole thing for several reasons:
1. I'm pregnant and am therefore emotional about everything.
2. I feel like it's my fault because I haven't been doing EVERYTHING I can to stay within range.
3. I breathed a sigh of relief when my OB/GYN said I didn't have gestational diabetes, but still knew I wasn't normal and today made me realize I really do have it.
4. I hate needles. Pricking myself has been bad enough, now I have to give myself a shot once a day.
I am just tired. I want this pregnancy to be over so I know she's here and she's safe and my body can return to a state of normalcy. In the meantime, I'm trying to get a handle on my emotions and trying to find the will to do better.
And the Road Takes Another Turn
Well I'm 31 weeks now and had a doctor's appointment yesterday that was very interesting. To sum it up, let's just say my doctor took a look at my blood sugar numbers over the past couple weeks and pretty much said they were too good...that I don't have gestational diabetes. What??????????? Yeah, so we talked about it and remember how I said I thought it was strange that they didn't have me fast before the three hour glucose test? Well I WAS supposed to. So, obviously my sugars would be ridiculously high since your fasting blood sugar should be quite a bit lower than it is after you eat. Anyway, I do still have a sensitivity to carbs and sugars as displayed by my numbers when I have too much, but now all I have to do is stick to the diet and keep up the exercise and only test ONCE a day. Can I just tell you how nice that is? I really don't mind the diet too much. It's a healthier way to live...and something I want to teach Zoe early on. And I only gained one pound in the last four weeks, which is AWESOME. Overall, I feel less stressed and that is wonderful.
In other news, I got to go home last weekend to have my family/friend baby shower in New Mexico. It was so much fun! I got a lot of cute things and a few things we really needed...we're still lacking some basics, but hopefully after the next shower and our purchases we'll have basics as well. Also, my Mom made me cry at the sight of the most beautiful blessing dress I have ever seen. She hand crocheted it and added little bow and ribbon details to it that made it nothing short of exquisite. She made me leave it home so she could finish a couple things, but I got a couple pictures. I will try to post them tonight. It was awesome to spend time with my family. Zoe and I got plenty of attention as she is the first grandchild in my family and the first great grandchild on my Dad's side of the family. Everyone is so excited...which just feeds my excitement. One night while I was home, I had both sisters, my Mom and my little brother feeling my belly trying to elicit a kick or a movement from Zoe. It was quite exciting for them and I can tell Zoe is going to be one spoiled little girl. I also got a chance to see a lot of good friends while I was home. One in particular who just had a baby- and looks great! Little Eila Ruth is just beautiful and Esme is getting so big, I can't believe it! Overall it was an awesome trip, but I wish it had been longer and I could have spent more time with a few people...you know who you are.
As for little Zoe, she is getting so big! Weighing in at a whopping 3 lbs 5 oz (roughly) and measuring nearly 15 inches long. Of course these are just estimates, but I can feel how big she's getting in there. She's certainly running out of room. According to my Mom, she has dropped a bit- hopefully taking advantage of some of the space being tall affords me. It's funny/ a little painful when she stretches out and I can feel her simultaneously in my ribs and lower pelvis. As for me, things are going fine- besides just starting to feel the aches and pains of pregnancy...and hoping that a combination of rest and exercise will alleviate some of it.
There are babies everywhere. Before I left for home, Love and I were able to stop by the hospital Thursday night to meet our newest niece. She is healthy and beautiful and we fell in love instantly! I was excited to see her before I left. I swear every baby I hold makes me want Zoe to be here now- though I know she's not ready and hope she won't come until she is. Love is getting just as antsy. All this new baby stuff around, two new nieces to cuddle...it's no wonder we can't wait...not to mention how long it took for us to get to this point. I know she will be here before we know it though.
Lastly, I want to mention two things:
First, I am so grateful for the sweet, supportive comments I received about my fears about becoming a mother. I am constantly touched by old and new friends who form a strong support system with me on this little site of mine and grateful that you think so much of me.
Second, I think I'm going to try something new...and I'm going to hope I don't bore you out of your minds. I have become a blogging slacker again and want to try to do something to get myself used to writing more- which will hopefully shorten the really long posts once a week. So, I have decided to write something...anything...once a day to get back in the habit...and hope you will bear with me while I experiment. Thanks in advance!
In other news, I got to go home last weekend to have my family/friend baby shower in New Mexico. It was so much fun! I got a lot of cute things and a few things we really needed...we're still lacking some basics, but hopefully after the next shower and our purchases we'll have basics as well. Also, my Mom made me cry at the sight of the most beautiful blessing dress I have ever seen. She hand crocheted it and added little bow and ribbon details to it that made it nothing short of exquisite. She made me leave it home so she could finish a couple things, but I got a couple pictures. I will try to post them tonight. It was awesome to spend time with my family. Zoe and I got plenty of attention as she is the first grandchild in my family and the first great grandchild on my Dad's side of the family. Everyone is so excited...which just feeds my excitement. One night while I was home, I had both sisters, my Mom and my little brother feeling my belly trying to elicit a kick or a movement from Zoe. It was quite exciting for them and I can tell Zoe is going to be one spoiled little girl. I also got a chance to see a lot of good friends while I was home. One in particular who just had a baby- and looks great! Little Eila Ruth is just beautiful and Esme is getting so big, I can't believe it! Overall it was an awesome trip, but I wish it had been longer and I could have spent more time with a few people...you know who you are.
As for little Zoe, she is getting so big! Weighing in at a whopping 3 lbs 5 oz (roughly) and measuring nearly 15 inches long. Of course these are just estimates, but I can feel how big she's getting in there. She's certainly running out of room. According to my Mom, she has dropped a bit- hopefully taking advantage of some of the space being tall affords me. It's funny/ a little painful when she stretches out and I can feel her simultaneously in my ribs and lower pelvis. As for me, things are going fine- besides just starting to feel the aches and pains of pregnancy...and hoping that a combination of rest and exercise will alleviate some of it.
There are babies everywhere. Before I left for home, Love and I were able to stop by the hospital Thursday night to meet our newest niece. She is healthy and beautiful and we fell in love instantly! I was excited to see her before I left. I swear every baby I hold makes me want Zoe to be here now- though I know she's not ready and hope she won't come until she is. Love is getting just as antsy. All this new baby stuff around, two new nieces to cuddle...it's no wonder we can't wait...not to mention how long it took for us to get to this point. I know she will be here before we know it though.
Lastly, I want to mention two things:
First, I am so grateful for the sweet, supportive comments I received about my fears about becoming a mother. I am constantly touched by old and new friends who form a strong support system with me on this little site of mine and grateful that you think so much of me.
Second, I think I'm going to try something new...and I'm going to hope I don't bore you out of your minds. I have become a blogging slacker again and want to try to do something to get myself used to writing more- which will hopefully shorten the really long posts once a week. So, I have decided to write something...anything...once a day to get back in the habit...and hope you will bear with me while I experiment. Thanks in advance!
Living With Diabetes
Well, Gestational Diabetes is certainly not fun. Carb counting is not fun. Pricking your finger 7 times a day is not fun. Worrying every time the blood sugar is high is not fun. Is it worth it for Zoe? OF COURSE! To tell you the truth, while living this restricted lifestyle is frustrating, it's not that hard. This last week I went to see the Diabetes Educator- who just answered any questions I had and gave me some basic instruction on what I could eat. Then I went to a Dietitian- who gave me my specific meal plan and increased my blood sugar testing to 7 times a day. Now that I have a plan...a way to actively prevent the bad side effects of this...I'm doing OK. I don't miss soda and chocolate that much...and doing it all for my little baby girl makes it so much easier. What's three months of restricted diet and pricking my finger for a lifetime with her?
I haven't really had a lot of time to post lately, so 29 weeks was skipped...sorry! Life has been crazy. It seems like everywhere we turn there's something else going on. Time is ticking on and it's not really that long until we'll have a new little person in our lives. Can I tell you something? As much as I've been wanting this and for all we went through to get here...I'm a little scared. I keep having dreams that I won't know what to do, or that we'll struggle financially, or that we won't be ready. I worry that I won't be a good enough mom, that I'll have to work too much, that her life will fly by as fast as this pregnancy and I'm going to miss so much of it at work. I worry about all that already and she's not even here yet! Did any of you moms feel this way? How did you make yourself feel better?
Anyway, I'll make sure to post again soon! Take care my friends...and pray for warm weather!
I haven't really had a lot of time to post lately, so 29 weeks was skipped...sorry! Life has been crazy. It seems like everywhere we turn there's something else going on. Time is ticking on and it's not really that long until we'll have a new little person in our lives. Can I tell you something? As much as I've been wanting this and for all we went through to get here...I'm a little scared. I keep having dreams that I won't know what to do, or that we'll struggle financially, or that we won't be ready. I worry that I won't be a good enough mom, that I'll have to work too much, that her life will fly by as fast as this pregnancy and I'm going to miss so much of it at work. I worry about all that already and she's not even here yet! Did any of you moms feel this way? How did you make yourself feel better?
Anyway, I'll make sure to post again soon! Take care my friends...and pray for warm weather!
28 Weeks
Yes, I know. I skipped 27 weeks. For that I'm sorry. Life has been a slippery slope lately. Too much going on and I never seem to get my footing. Last week was my doctor's appointment/ glucose test (just the one-blood-sample test an hour after drinking the drink). The doctor's appointment went fine, everything looked normal. The drink didn't make me sick and they took my blood and I thought I was fine. Then, I got a call on Monday from the Nurse informing me that I'm slightly anemic and needed to start taking iron supplements alongside my prenatals. She also told me that my glucose levels from the test came in high and I needed to come in for another test. This test is the same except they have to take your blood every hour for three hours after you drink the drink and you have to stay in the lobby the whole time. So, not looking forward to the waiting, I showed up this morning. They pricked my finger to check my sugars before starting the test and they were already high. The lab called my doctor to see if he still wanted me to take the test- I guess it can really make you sick if your sugars are high before drinking the glucose drink. He said not to start the test and wanted me upstairs in his office. I went upstairs and the nurse gave me a pamphlet on Gestational Diabetes and a number to a Diabetes Educator so I could call and make an appointment.
Well friends, that's my predicament. It frightens me slightly because of the risks- none of which I feel like listing right now. Also, I'm going to have to basically change my whole diet. I've never been one to count carbs or calories and, admittedly, haven't been very good at regular exercise in the last few years. OF COURSE I will do everything I'm supposed to so I can keep myself and my baby healthy...but it still sucks. I'm sort of glad that I HAVE to exercise now because I've been wanting to...it's just hard to find the time and the motivation. Anyway, I have an appointment on Friday with the Diabetes Educator...we'll see what they have to say. Has anyone out there had experience with Gestational Diabetes? If so, I'd love to hear your thoughts!
Ok...so two days later I am finally posting the promised picture taken today (April 11th). It's blurry again so either I need a new camera, or Love needs to learn how to work ours. (Sorry Love)
Well friends, that's my predicament. It frightens me slightly because of the risks- none of which I feel like listing right now. Also, I'm going to have to basically change my whole diet. I've never been one to count carbs or calories and, admittedly, haven't been very good at regular exercise in the last few years. OF COURSE I will do everything I'm supposed to so I can keep myself and my baby healthy...but it still sucks. I'm sort of glad that I HAVE to exercise now because I've been wanting to...it's just hard to find the time and the motivation. Anyway, I have an appointment on Friday with the Diabetes Educator...we'll see what they have to say. Has anyone out there had experience with Gestational Diabetes? If so, I'd love to hear your thoughts!
Ok...so two days later I am finally posting the promised picture taken today (April 11th). It's blurry again so either I need a new camera, or Love needs to learn how to work ours. (Sorry Love)
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